Binge Responsibly, Kids

I'm ready.

I collaged and photoshopped some magazine/news paper clippings I found to help any inexperienced binge watchers

While we're on the subject of Arrested Development, I designed this card for a friend, a fellow AD fan. At the time I didn't have my computer so I had to do everything by hand. I'll upgrade it to a digital painting eventually. I found my idea mighty clever to be perfectly blunt.

A seal would never attack a human. Unless, of course, it had acquired a taste for mammal blood.

Evil Incarnate

Allow me to recount last night's events...

I couldn't fall asleep so I decided to watch a show on my phone. I'm starting to drift off at around 2am when horror struck. SHELOB strutting in front of the only light source in the room and 3 inches from my FACE. My fight or flight response chose flight. 

I screamed, I flipped, I rolled, I panicked.

Heart rate 300 BPM and lying on the floor, I then saw the beast crawling on my wall. I summoned the courage to trap it under a cup and flushed satan's spawn down to its watery grave. Suffice to say, I didn't sleep to well after that freak show. Every 10 minutes I was swatting at something because I was convinced its god damn family was prowling near by. 

Went down like this ↓

No exaggeration on the spider size. But keep in mind this isn't Australia's house of horrors. So don't expect a foot long spider in this account...thank god.

I asked my family the next day if they heard me screaming. They didn't. It's comforting to know that if I'm murdered in my sleep my screams won't disturb their slumber.